The Chimes

Issue date: 11/5/09 Section: Lifestyles

Q: My girlfriend recently told me that she didn't want to do "stuff" anymore unless I started manscaping ... Is it worth it?

A: Well, Harry, I'd say that unless you are participating in No-Shave November, then yes you need to rid yourself of the devil's tool that I like to call pubic hair.

It is just as important for the guy to shave or "manscape" as it is for the girl.

Think about it:most guys don't want to go down on a girl only to find that there's a vast forest of nappy pubes. Just the same, most girls don't want to try to find your disco stick among a dance floor of hair.

There are actually some pros to shaving: for those of you who are understocked in the deli section, shaving can give the illusion of a few more inches to your pepperoni.

It also can help prevent things like swamp-ass, depending on where and how much you shave. And most of all it helps keep those skeevy little critters known as pubic lice at bay.

However, don't go overboard. Be subtle. It's okay to leave some stuble.

Shaving every day can be a bad idea. Let it grow for a few days; just make sure it doesn't turn into a shag carpet. No one wants to mess around with Austin Powers, baby.

Also, avoid shaving things like your armpits and chest (unless you're into that), you need some hair to prove your manhood. If you're still uncomfortable with the idea of shaving, find the humor in it.

Try shaving funny things like an arrow pointing down to the goods into your pubic hair. It will add humor to the situation and it shows that you take into consideration the things your girlfriend has to say, but also have your own set of guidelines that you plan on following.

Ladies, it's also important for you to replace your carpet for Linoleum once in a while too. Follow the same rules and make it fun.

And for those of you who are kinky and like to mix it up in the bedroom once in a while, try shaving each other's private areas. It'll help secure the trust between the two of you and it makes for some cheap foreplay.

So, start mowing the grass or you'll be left out on your ass.

And as always, stay classy, Capital.

By Connor Thompson
chimes@capital.edu

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